On Thursday of this past week I had an entire day, yes, a DAY of triggers (see What Triggered Me? Image) to the extent that they hooked me and got in my craw*. It wasn’t just one thing, it was a combination of many little things. It was like the drip from the water faucet, consistent and irritating. I found myself being a person I don’t want to be. Totally caught up in the chaos and negativity. I felt the density of energy pushing up against me, trying to get me to absolutely lose it on something or someone. Losing it for me is yelling at someone, demanding and outright entitled. My mind gets stuck on a belief and just won’t let go. I can feel when this starts happening, and many times I’m able to slow it down and dismantle it before it gets to the point it did.
Do you ever have that happen? A small item, such as my daily coffee now costing 25 cents more isn’t that big of a deal, right? But, it was a surprise, and I made the decision to get a smaller size coffee to keep at the budget I have set. No biggy right? Still getting my coffee, still paying the same amount as before. But it started sneaking into the irritation space.
I talk about things getting in my craw. In a physical sense for me, it’s like the irritation gets caught in the back of my mouth against my cheek and teeth. That space where food can get stuck and my tongue can’t fish it out. It’s stuck and the only way I can get that piece of food out is to take my finger and dig it out. What an analogy huh?
So, that little irritation got added to very quickly with other things going on. From no heat in my apartment, to communication not being clear for me, and then as long as I was accepting irritations and the craw was accepting, my mind went on a shopping trip and started adding all kinds of random thoughts that would get me even further into the chaos and irritation. I went into victim mode.
Now normally, I’m able to use my tools to dismantle, reassemble and recenter myself, pulling in more peace and not be affected. However, something energetically was happening in the collective and I was swept up into it.
Here are some of the triggers I could identify with; I felt powerless, unheard, felt like the bad guy, and frustrated along with many other triggers. When I reflect on where it feels like the collective is I believe any people are feeling these things. When I say we are all connected, we really are. Many times, it can be challenging to not get caught up in the news, others anger and frustration or lack of connecting. Sometimes it can feel like we are so disconnected that we aren’t even connected to anything, let alone ourselves.
I rarely am in this space for an entire day and so I share this with you to hopefully provide grace and tools to help you.
The tools I chose were to connect to my breath. Remembering to connect within. I also reached out to a couple of different friends and allowed myself to vent. To just really let myself vent out my frustration. It did help a little and I don’t regret doing it. What really helped me was to sit quietly, holding black tourmaline** stones, closing my eyes and visioning all the negative energy being sent into the stones and out the bottom of my feet. I also connected with my heart and opened it to receive light and calming energy. I reclaimed my inner light, that column of light in the center of my being that I identify is me. I also laughed. I laughed about little things, I saw the humor in my reactions and let myself lighten up.
What is super interesting is that when I did this, guess what? The craw space became less restrictive and all that crud that had gotten stuck broke loose and dissipated, leaving my energy much clearer and filled with light. On Friday morning, it was as if the day before hadn’t even happened. I had much clearer perspective and felt centered and grounded.
Now is the time to start checking your “tool box” for what tools you can utilize when things come up that you may get caught in. Need updated or new tools? Is it time to come in and brainstorm on what works, what doesn’t and what new ways can you incorporate these tools into your day to day life?
*Where does the expression stuck in my craw come from?
Hunters centuries ago noticed that some birds swallowed bits of stone that were too large to pass through the craw and into the digestive tract. These stones, unlike the sand and pebbles needed by birds to help grind food in the pouch, literally stuck in the craw, couldn’t go down any farther.
Definition of stuck in one’s craw. past tense of stick in one’s craw. as in annoyed. to disturb the peace of mind of (someone) especially by repeated disagreeable acts.
**Black Tourmaline crystal healing properties are most well-known for protection-related intentions. By shielding your energy in a bubble of protection, the Black Tourmaline crystal meaning can ward off unwanted energy and low vibrations that come from other people, places, or even situations.
